Second foray into the mind

On our way to wherever we're going next, Artemis is going to go inside his own mind again. He'll be in his room when he does this. Just in case something happens to him and he doesn't wake up for a while (which he won't!) he's going to leave a message for the others (Tryce, Freya, Mina, Kerlos, Eight, and Dannel). I'll post the message on the open section of the forums as well:

As I believe some of you know, I've been working on a way to use the Force to cure my own insanity. I've read about a technique similar to what we all did to cure Mina of Xel'lotath's mark; I'm going inside my own mind to look for the source. As it is not a safe procedure (I attempted this once before with interesting results), I thought it best to inform you all, in case something should happen to me.

I hope to see you all again soon. May the Force be with you.

Artemis

Sorry it's taken me so long to get to this. This week is proving to be as busy as last week.

As the ships fades around you into nightmares, you find yourself back in the hallway of the hospital were you last left your dream. In front of you are the two broken remains of the lightsaber the Shadow wielded. You do notice that one think has changed. There are bloody skid marks of something being dragged away on the floor going into the room the Shadow emerged. The room is labeled O.R. However behind you in the opposite direction you see a light on in another room down the hall and the room is labeled Lab.

No worries!

Artemis picks up the two broken pieces of lightsaber and eyes the bloodied skid marks. He creeps to the wall and inches along that until he can peer through the window in the door to the room that the Shadow emerged from. If he doesn't see anything in there, he'll inch quietly away and make for the Lab.

As you inch closer to the door from which the Shadow emerged you hear the soft hum of laser scalpels and the sopping wet sound of flesh being cut into. Peering into the O.R. you see four more Shadow, these smaller than the last you just encountered. These four are dressed in bloodied and torn surgery scrubs. One of them is audibly speaking to the others but the words are impossible for you to make from your current position. The subject on the table is obscured by the four of them but you do catch some glimpses of pale flesh.

Though tempted to just leave the room alone and head towards the lab, Artemis reminds himself that he is here to root out the source of his insanity. He figures that he shouldn't ignore the Shadows. Just in case, he'll turn on lightsaber combat and combat sense, and then open the door into the operating room.

As you enter the room you catch a brief snippet of the conversation.

"....ject refuses to accept..."

The conversation is cut short as all four notice you at once. A low guttural growl is emitted by all four Shadows as they turn and glare at you with red glowing eyes peeking out behind the surgical scrubs. You notice large chunks of their current project lying on a nearby table and as you notice the hands of the larger of the Shadows you realize where that laser scalpel hum was coming from. Where the other three shadows have claws, the end of each of the larger Shadows fingers are glowing red like ten miniature lightsabers.

"Nurse, prepare another table." Says the lead Shadow as all four slowly converge on you.

Artemis clicks his lightsaber on and assumes a full defensive stance, not really willing to attack them first, and more curious to know what's going on.

"Subject refuses to accept what?" he asks them. "What are you doing?"

"Surgery." Says the lead Shadow, with the other 3 chiming in quickly, "Surgery!"

A creaky and rusted gurney wheels it's way towards you loaded down with restraints. Two of the Nurse Shadows begin to side step, one to the left of you and the other to the right in order to surround you. As they shift their formation around you, you catch a glimpse of a pair of human-like eyes sitting among the removed pieces of the other subject.

Artemis tests the door behind him with one hand and without turning around, unwilling to let himself be completely surrounded. If the door is unlocked, he'll push through it and fight anyone who tries to follow him out. If it has locked behind him, then he'll keep his back to the door and strike at anyone who comes within lightsaber distance of him.

"No," he mutters, "I never was a fan of surgery. I dislike it rather vehemently. Subject refuses to accept what? This is my head! Answer me! What am I refusing to accept?"

The door is unlocked and the Shadows aren't quick enough to stop you from pushing through and leaving the O.R.

As you back away into the hallway you entered in from the double doors to the O.R. swing open and shut a couple times. As lights flicker on and off in the room it does not appear as if they are giving chase. The last word you hear from the lead Shadow as the door creaks shut completely is, "Responsibility."

Artemis stares at the flickering lights and the doors swinging open, closed, open, closed. He sighs. "I know," he tells the door. "But I can't go, just yet. I'm needed with STARS. I'm needed to stop this new virus, Dr. Da'ryan's virus. I'm needed here...aren't I?"

For not the first time, Artemis doubts the verity of the words that he keeps telling himself. He knows that he could turn himself in to Caduceus. He knows that they would (probably) grant him asylum for long enough to cure the new virus. And he knows that he, specifically, is not really needed in STARS. His skills as a healer could be easily matched by another healing-proficient Jedi. The group hasn't needed him to treat any major wounds since Freya almost died. And Artemis is pretty sure that he has no friends in the group, other than maybe Eight. He knows that bounty hunters are probably closing in on him, and running is not going to save him. He is a liability to the team.

But he doesn't want to leave. And who is to say that Caduceus will keep him, anyway? Maybe, in spite of his brilliant expertise in virology, they'll just turn him over to the Defel.

Conflicted with thoughts that have plagued him many times before, Artemis turns and cautiously heads towards the room marked "Lab".

As you peek into the lab you are taken aback by an almost familiar sight. It looks almost exactly like your old Aretak lab. The major difference being that everything in this lab is a bit rusted and grimy. You see three other Arahn's scattered about this lab. All of them seem deep in their work with their faces buried in microscopes.

Artemis is indeed taken aback. He stops inside the door and stares at the equipment, the placements, functions, and problems of which he knows by heart. Then he looks at the three Arahns, none of whom seem to have noticed his entry. He steps closer to the one nearest him and clears his throat. He knows better than to startle a researcher whose mind is elsewhere.

"Excuse me?" he calls softly to the nearest Arhan.

As the Arahn pulls himself away from the microscope and turns, you find yourself backing away startled.

Two bloody sockets stare blankly at you from where his eyes should be.

"Yes doctor?" The Arahn asks in a voice devoid of any emotion.

"Ah!" Artemis starts and steps back involuntarily, his own eyes wide. He stares for a moment and opens his mouth to ask a question. But he stops, as he realizes that he probably already knows the answer to that question. Why are your eyes missing?

Because I was blind, Artemis answers himself. Instead, he asks a different question. He might know the answer to this one as well, but he needs confirmation.

"What are you working on?"

A second Arahn looks up from his microscope greeting you with the same ghastly visage.

"The cure of course."

The third looks up as well looking like the others.

"We have to find the cure. The galaxy needs us, needs you."

The first chimes in.

"We can't do it without you doctor."

He points you to an empty chair and microscope and all three go back to their work.

Well, yep, Artemis thinks, his suspicions confirmed.

"The cure to what? The cure to the Defel's disease?" he asks. He doesn't move for the empty chair. "And how long has it been since any of you ate or slept?"

"No the new threat, Galatea." Says the second.

"But we're doing just fine." Says the third.

"We've just woken up." Says the first.

"And you keep us well fed." Ends the second.

That leaves Artemis rather stumped. Not what he expected, no indeed. Was this the answer to his previous internal question? He needed to be working on the cure, right? Galatea? It was something that he had to do. And...and if these people were well-rested and well-fed, like he knew he needed to be, then... then why were they still blind?

Artemis stares at the microscope, wondering what sort of trap lay behind the lenses. Do I take a look? he wonders, or do I leave it alone?

He takes a step towards the empty seat and stops. I'm here to find out why I'm insane. I have my experiments waiting for me to start them once I wake up. This is neither the time nor the place for that.

"I need to organize my notes first," he tells the other three, and it isn't really a lie. He needs to organize the chaotic files of his mind before he can do anything else. "I'll be back soon." He pauses. "Maybe this will help me sort through my ideas, though. What have you found out so far?"

The third is about to speak when all three stop and look towards the door you came in. Outside you can hear heavy footsteps slowly approaching the door.

"You should get to work." The third buries himself back into his microscope.

"The director will be angry if you're not working." The second busies himself with scrawling notes.

"No more questions." The first switches out slides on his microscope.

The footsteps are almost at the door, but this is just the commons lab. There are private labs and offices through the door opposite where you came in.

Artemis dashes towards the opposite door, where the private labs and offices are located, trying to make it behind the door before the director enters. If he makes it, he'll wait behind the door and try to listen in on what's happening. If there's a window in the door, he'll peek through a bottom corner to try to glimpse what the director looks like.

If he doesn't make it, he'll slow to a walk as the director steps in, but he'll still go to open the door.

As you rush through the door to the other labs you hear the far door opening behind you. A familiar and stern voice calls after you.

"Running again boy? Why am I not surprised?"

You turn around in surprise expecting to see your father, but the door is gone as is the hospital.

Your standing in the middle of a path in a heavilly wooded park, and you're four years old. Ahead on the path you see your mother walking away from you in the distance.

"Hurry up Artemis! You'll miss out."

Artemis's heart leaps in abject terror as he hears that voice. His mind is so consumed by the fear that it takes him a few moments to realize that the hospital is gone. But he likes the woods. The woods are safer, better. He can hide in the woods, hide away from the demons that wait for him at home.

He squints at the figure ahead. ...Mom? he wonders. He's only ever seen her image in holographs before. He used to stare at her careworn features and wonder why she couldn't have taken him with her when she left.

Needles clench around his heart. I'll miss out! I can't miss out! She'll leave again, and I'll be left behind with them! Artemis lunges forward, feet thudding into the ground at a dead run, sprinting with all of his energy. "Wait for me!" he shouts.

You run as fast as your tiny four year old legs can carry you. Somewhere in your mind you remember this, a festival on Aretak. The Union Festival celebrated between the Arahn and the Defel on having settled this colony together. It was the last one you attended and the last happy memory you have of your mother. She left shortly after this and you never saw her again. You start to wonder why you never tried contacting her, but then remember how your dad convinced you it was your fault she left.

As all this floods your mind you barely realize you've almost caught up, as you snap back from your memories you smack face first into a branch whipping back into place your mother had just brushed aside. The impact stings your face and knocks you to ground crying as your mother walks on unaware of what happened to you.

"It's okay." You hear the voice of another kid next to you and turn to see a young Defel girl, about the same age as you.

"It's just a scratch. Here, I make it better."

She pulls out a band-aid from her side pack, and puts it on your forehead giving it a little kiss as well.

"See all better."

She offers you her hand and the two of you catch up with your mother in time to watch the fireworks display. As the fireworks go off you look back at the girl that helped you. Some of the fireworks were made specifically for the spectrum that only the Defels can see in, and when they go off, for that instant they stop being shadows. You see glimpses of them in their true forms. The little girl has brilliant purple fur and a green muzzle. The next flash is so bright it blinds you, and when you see again, you find yourself back in your old office at the labs, no longer four, but as your current self.

Artemis's knees begin to tremble, then buckle, and he catches himself by slumping against the wall at his back. He brushes his fingers over his face, searching for the scratch inflicted by the branch, but he doesn't feel anything. His hands lower, bracing the palms against the wall.

He was on the right track. He had something there, he knew it. Those were memories that shook him more than anything he'd seen thus far.

I know this office, Artemis thinks. ...I don't like it here any longer. Despite this sentiment, he finds himself moving towards his desk and shuffling through the papers, looking to find anything of significance.